The Other Belyn Girl

Multiple Generations At Work

2011-12-09T01:32:00.000-08:00

As a soon-to-be graduate, one of the challenges in joining the work force is combining generation gaps in one professional location and trying to work with people from all age groups.

According to Ron Zemke's Generations at Work: Managing the Clash of Veterans, Boomers, Xers, and Nexters in Your Workplace, the generations that are present at work are:

Baby Boomers 1943 - 1960 (73.2 million people). Those born during or after World War II and raised in the era of extreme optimism, opportunity and progress.
Generation Xers 1960 - 1980 (70.1 million people). Those born after the blush of the Baby Boom and and came of age deep in the shadow of the Boomers and the rise of the Asian tigers (South Korea, Hong Kong, Singapore, and Taiwan).
Generation Nexters 1980 - 2000 (more than 70 million people). Those born of the Baby Boomers and early Xers and into our current high-tech, neo-optimistic time.

While I am just a part-time social media consultant, I find that even a little bit of time at the multi-generational office can be interesting, frustrating, and awkward.

Rachel, an elderly, Jewish woman is one of my clients for social media. She asks me for help with tech-related tasks, and tries to give me advice about my personal life. It's a bit unprofessional in my opinion, but what can I do? Due to the age gap, I think she thinks of me as a granddaughter. As much as she makes me feel uncomfortable at times, I do appreciate the intention behind her gestures.

She is one of the older people that I keep in touch with on a regular basis. Her presence makes me realize how frustrating it can be for younger generations to communicate with older generations. But no matter how frustrated we get, we must always remember to respect and help our older peers. We, as the younger members of the workforce, need to be more empathetic and try to develop new strategies of communication that work best with their generations. For example, I've learned that many of the Baby Boomers and Xers at work understand the basic concept of e-mail. Luckily, they use it, but when it comes to taking notes, they prefer to bust out their note pads and write it all out.

I've taught many of my co-workers to text and the beauty of smart phones. At the same time, I find myself adapting to some of the things that they do too. I notice that they prefer phone calls over texts, but they will text me if I'm unresponsive. They also have a habit of getting viruses on their computers or getting sucked into e-mail scams because they just can't differentiate what's real or not real on their laptops. It's not that they're less knowledgeable or don't know how to communicate. All humans learn the ability to communicate and it becomes their main mode. It just becomes a little more difficult when we have to combine all these modes in a single location.

Image Source: https://encrypted-tbn2.google.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTL8LZ9zsVp5mlckwmm-V62MI8AIMUssNJwwCptQnw8V_DbxEbZkQ

Source: Generations at Work: Managing the Clash of Veterans, Boomers, Xers, and Nexters in Your Workplace by Ron Zemke, Claire Raines, Bob Filipczak

Interested in Real Estate Career in the OC?

2011-12-06T15:26:00.000-08:00

The amazing management team at work.

Evergreen Realty & Associates, Inc., one of the largest real estate brokerages in Orange County (and also the company I work at right now), was named as a Top Workplace by the Orange County Register. On December 1, members of Evergreen's management team attended the Top Workplace ceremony held at the City National Grove of Anaheim. Other Top Workplace companies such as Blizzard Entertainment and Trace 3 were also part of this event.

Evergreen was recognized as the number one Top Workplace for the second time. View the video except to see why.

http://www.ocregister.com/video/v/1303339651001/business-lenin-workplaces

The founder, Tina Rector, was awarded with the Large Company Leadership award for her strong values and humble leadership style. Below is an except from the Top Workplace article on Tina, written by Jan Norman:

"Tina Rector's leadership style might best be described as humble. Although she received the leadership award this year, she said her best move as leader was putting son Randy in charge of the growing real estate company. (He has won the Register Top Workplaces leadership award in the past.)

'Randy has taught me a lot,' she said. 'I'm not a corporate person. He was a CPA and brought on board good practices. I sometimes forget he's my son and admire what he is doing.'

Employee praise for Tina Rector included 'communicates well with everybody' and 'supports all aspects for agent to have the best and most productive environment.'

When she started Evergreen Realty in 1993, Rector had a revolutionary idea: Instead of splitting her agents' commissions, she charged a flat fee.

'When I started (as an agent), I split my comissions 50-50 with the broker and I knew that was ridiculous. The broker didn't do that much for me,' she said.

The approach empowers the agents, Randy Rector said, but also frees Evergreen from depending too much on top-producing agents.

'I decided to go out on my own because of the unethical behavior of ot her brokers; things they allowed, we won't,' Tina Rector said. 'Years ago, I pulled aside an agent for doing something wrong and he said, 'I pay your salary.' I said, 'Excuse me. You are going to remember this for the rest of your life.' and I let him go.'"

The organization is known for continuously supporting its agents and for having a friendly and knowledgeable management team. If you would like to learn more about Evergreen Realty & Associates, Inc., visit http://www.evergreenrealty.net/ or e-mail lisa.schulz@evergreenrealty.net.

History & Future of Music (IMO)

2011-12-05T16:34:00.000-08:00

Like many stereotypical Asians, my musical experience started with learning the piano. I began when I was five years old, and have been playing it for 17 years and counting. Growing up, I listened to classical music, or whatever Mom and Dad listened to on the radio.

I began listening to mainstream music at the age of eight. My friends introduced me to Britney Spears, Backstreet Boys, N'Sync, 98 Degrees, and Christina Aguilera. I was addicted to their romantic pop songs. In my 4th grade classes, I would often day dream about falling in love and meeting the right guy. In hindsight, it seems silly for a girl at that age to be thinking about that kind of stuff. Then again, there was that one Justin Bieber fan whose heartache became viral on YouTube. But, I digress.

When I was thirteen, I began listening to electronic music. People thought it was weird. Who or what was Daft Punk? It wasn't very popular, but it was so damn catchy to me. I also listened to Tiesto and Paul Van Dyk. If anyone had asked me what my guilty pleasure was at the time, I would've said electronic music.

After pop music, hip hop and R&B became popular among the closest friends I had and the students at my school. Lil' John and 50 Cent were popular. My girl friends and I also fell in love with Usher. It must also be mentioned that I grew up in the Bay Area, so this is when hyphy music became the Hyphy Movement. In the Bay Area, E-40, Too Short, Keak Da Sneak, and Mistah Fab were just as respected as mainstream artists.

When the Hyphy Movement ended, it was back to mainstream hip hop and R & B. Throughout this time, Britney Spears and members of N'Sync had released many hits that reminded all of us that pop music was still amazing.

The next icon to break into the music industry was Lady Gaga. It's hard to determine her genre of music. Even she claims she doesn't have a specific genre. To me, she would mostly be pop, with some twists in hip hop and a lot of country in her song, "You and I". It really depends on Lady Gaga's mood. She's losing her shock factor, so where is music headed now?

Mainstream music is (not surprisingly) beginning to combine characteristics of hip hop and electronic genres in one. For example, David Guetta was named as the number one DJ in the world this year. Many hardcore trance fans were disappointed by this, but the truth is that Guetta's style combines hip hop, R&B, and house together, which can bring together listeners from all genres, making him an ideal choice when it comes to business and entertainment. When speaking solely on elements of music style, it's difficult for hardcore genre fans to accept the combination of music. If we listen to Britney Spears' "Hold It Against Me", we hear elements of dub-step. When I first heard the song, I was excited that mainstream music was introducing this genre, but many hardcore dub-step fans did not approve. In terms of future artists, those who are multi-talented will always have the edge. It also seems that the artists whose styles are "out of the norm" gain a lot of great PR. Nicki Minaj is a colorful singer and rapper whose songs are taking over the charts. In time, her fame will come to an end.

I'm looking forward to the future of music. What was once a guilty pleasure is becoming more of a mainstream style. In the end, it means more electronic music exposure for everyone!

Kaskade feat. Mindy Gledhill - Eyes

2011-11-26T19:13:00.000-08:00

Job Tips for Young Professionals

2011-09-13T14:57:00.000-07:00

If you've ever seen the movie Fight Club, you may recall that Mr. Tyler Durden was (at one point) addicted to group therapy sessions.

I have a similar addiction. I am obsessed with attending professional business presentations.

I've attended countless presentations that talk about networking, finding the job, standing out, [insert another motivational and professional topic here], etc. And those of you who know me well will understand that I love regurgitating the information. Why? I like teaching people things that I know and seeing the people I care about succeed.

The following information is taken from this conference that I attended called Succeed Faster (http://www.succeedfaster.com), which was hosted by Tim Augustine and Adam Carroll, two very distinguished speakers. With that being said, we will proceed.

The economy sucks right now. We all know that, but there are many industries that are booming at the moment.

Pharmaceuticals
Medical devices
Instrumentation
Biotech research and ancillary services
Renewable energy (wind, solar, biofuel)
Natural gas
Green technology
Technology (mobile)
Media/Communication
Start-up companies

You'll notice that health-related industries have taken over the list. It's not surprising considering that diseases, illnesses, and poor health behaviors will always exist - meaning there will always be a strong need in health/medical professions.

Whether you're interested in something related to the industries listed above (or not), there things that you can do to get to where you want to be.

First off, it's important to answer the following questions honestly and concretely.

What makes you unique?
What impact can you make?
What type of industry interests you?
What type of company would you like to work for?
What type of positions are you interested in?
What aspects of a company/job are most important to you?

Second, you want to write down a list of 10-15 companies that you would love to work for. Get yourself in the mindset that these companies can be realistic accomplishments for you.
It's also important to understand what companies are looking for. See whether or not you have the following traits for your ideal company:

Enthusiasm/Motivation
Industry / Market Knowledge
Related Experience
Flexibility / Ability to Adapt
Follow-Through
Communication Skills
Time Management Skills
Teamwork Experience
Personality / Cultural fit
Potential

You may or may not have the traits listed above, and that's okay. Because the most important thing that any job seeker can do is utilize her/his resources. What resources are we talking about?

Your Network
University Career Center
University Alumni Association
Recruitment Firms / Temp Agencies

There are other resources that may also be one click away.

Company sites, job boards: (BLS.gov, Monster.com, Businesswire.com, idealist.org)
Industry Associations (CSA.org - Chicago Software Association)
Social networking sites (Facebook.com, LinkedIn.com)

As we get into the technology/social media aspect of job searching, the idea of branding becomes important.
For the sake of brevity, I will discuss that topic in one of my next entries. I hope this was helpful! If not, shoot me an e-mail at belyn.lai@gmail.com so that I may answer any questions you have.
Good luck!

David Guetta feat. Usher - Without You

2011-09-13T14:55:00.000-07:00

Capo is a Gangster Boss

2011-08-27T12:07:00.000-07:00

A month ago, I welcomed someone special into my life.

This is my dog, Capo.

His name comes from the instrument tool that many guitarists fancy. Capo also stands for the head of a crime organization - aka - gangster boss.

He does things that irritate me. He barks every time I leave, so it's not always easy to get some alone time. His bark comes from the depths of Hell.

He gets a little frisky when I take him out, but is a sweet and calm dog when we are in the privacy of our own home.

He made a little accident in the middle of H&M at Irvine Spectrum.

He's a stubborn little puppy, and is the neediest of all the dogs I've had so far.

But, for some reason I still love him so much. Let me count the ways.

I love how his colors were painted on in 90% symmetry. His body is black, but the edges of him are tan. All of his limbs are white. His tail looks like it was dipped in white chocolate at birth.

He's also mastered the art of puppy eyes.

He's very calm when he's in the car or when I'm giving him a bath.

In the morning, he likes to roll on his back and stare at me until I rub his belly.

He walks around like he's all that, but when he sees other puppies, he runs the other way. Reminds me of the Cowardly Lion from the Wizard of Oz.

What I love most about Capo is his loyalty. No matter how much we get on each other's nerves, he is always there and he appreciates the little and big things I do for him.

I'm so lucky.

David Guetta feat. Nicki Minaj - Turn Me On

2011-08-27T12:03:00.001-07:00

Workaholics Vs. Work Enthusiasts

2011-07-22T17:09:00.000-07:00

The word "workaholism" came about in the early 1970s (1971, to be exact). It was first introduced by Wayne Oates, who defined it as, "...the compulsion or the uncontrollable need to work incessantly." It is an addiction to work and it is prevalent throughout the developed countries of the world." In many countries, it is seen as a "good" addiction. It's not. In fact, anything that ends in "-ism" isn't good.

Workaholics vs. Work Enthusiasts

Before you start labeling yourself as a "workaholic", it is important to keep in mind that there are multiple definitions of "workaholism", which is one of the reasons why studies on this addiction are limited. Recent studies have suggested that there are three components to consider when determining whether a person is a workaholic versus a work enthusiast.

Involvement
Drivenness
Enjoyment of Work

Workaholics score high in work involvement and drivenness, but score low in enjoyment of work. Work enthusiasts score high in all three categories.

Behaviors of Workaholics and Work Enthusiasts

Workaholics are usually negatively portrayed as being perfectionists, control freaks, unable to delegate, lack flexibility, may engage in unproductive work to stretch out tasks, and experience more work conflict than other workers.

Work enthusiasts are achievement oriented, do well in terms of job performance, high on citizenship (pro-social) behaviors, and do well in terms of adaptability and creativity. They are innovative.

At this point, you should be able to determine whether you are a workaholic or a work enthusiast. If you are a work enthusiast, give yourself a pat on your shoulder.

More on Workaholics

Keep in mind that workaholics have a compulsion to work. Therefore, if a person is working long hours because of financial obligations, he/she is not a workaholic.

There are some studies that have compared workaholics to alcoholics. Surprisingly, researchers have found similarities between the two. Some of the symptoms that both groups share include: depression, anxiety, stress, skewed perception of reality, and relationship issues with friends and family members.

You get the gist of it. Workaholism is not good for you, your health, and the people that you love. Fortunately, there are resources out there for workaholics. As a previous workaholic (now a work enthusiast), I know it is possible to convert that energy into something more positive.

http://www.workaholics-anonymous.org

Workaholics Anonymous helps those who are negatively addicted to work and helps them get their lives back on track. If you know that you are suffering from workaholism, check it out.

And check out this amazing infographic below. It contains interesting workaholism facts.

A Helpful Networking Tip

2011-07-22T15:50:00.000-07:00

I recently went to Chicago, IL for a conference that focused on professional development and how to reach success in a nutshell. Hosted by Adam Carroll and Tim Augustine, Succeed Faster (http://www.succeedfaster.com) was fun, intense, and educational. Anyone who knows me knows that I like to participate in an activity if there is a productive or educational component to it. In this jam-packed weekend, I learned a gazillion things. Now, as a sharer, advice-giver, blogger, leader, mentor, etc., I would like to share some of the information that I learned last weekend.

A Helpful Networking Tip

One of the speakers, Chad Carden, was enthusiastic and charismatic. What I enjoyed most from this $25,000 dollar speaker was how he could paint pictures in anyone's head. This is what he said to the audience:

Imagine a huge, gold name plate. On top of this name plate is your dream house. When you walk into this dream house, you see a map of the world on the right. Under this map, you see a yellow work glove, which has an airplane on top. When you look at the propellers, you will notice that they are actually tennis racquets. On the left tennis racquet, you see a family portrait. On the right tennis racquet, there is a wedding invitation. On the corner of the wedding invitation, you see a business card. On top of the business card is a microphone.

If you can remember this visual, networking won't be as hard as it once was. Here is how it can be interpreted:

Name plate: What is the person's name?
Dream house: Where is he/she from?
Map of the world: Where has he/she traveled to?
Yellow work glove: What does the person do for a living?
Tennis racquets: What are the person's hobbies?
Family portrait: Any siblings?
Wedding invitation: Why is he/she at the event/venue?
Business card: Ask for the person's business card!
Microphone: Record what you learned about him/her! Jot down the person's information on the back of the business card so you'll always remember a few things about him/her.

The next time you meet someone, try asking some of these questions and see where the conversation goes!

The LeaderShape Experience Day 1: Building Community

2011-07-01T20:42:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer: For those who are interested in participating in LeaderShape sometime in the future, please do not read my posts because it will take away from the amazing experience. All you have to know is that it is a life-changing experience, and you will grow exponentially throughout the week. I am only posting my experience for reflection purposes, and to share my experience with other LeaderShapers. You have been warned.

We arrived in the Learning Center things were somewhat fresh and slightly awkward. Maybe it was only awkward because I was the last one to be seated.

The room held 75 LeaderShapers. All of which included participants, cluster leaders, facilitators, and our lovely Operations person.

Being the silly, enthusiastic, and outgoing person that I was, I caused the most ruckus. I turned around to the row behind me to apologize. Instead, they introduced themselves to me. That was the first time I met Kenneth and Balogun.

"You're from Alaska?!" I remarked.
"Yeah, we're all from Alaska."
"Whoa, what's it like?"
-Silence-

I realized that the presenters were still talking so I decided to save that conversation for later.

For a few hours hours, we focused on the development of community. As a collective group, we came up with essential principles that would define our LeaderShape Davis 2011 community. Some keywords included: diversity, respect, integrity, communication, etc. Next, we were divided into sub-groups that focused on the principles of LeaderShape. We were asked to pick a group that spoke to our hearts the most.

Possibility
Vision
Relationships
Action
Integrity
Community
Positive Change

Integrity stuck out to me like a sore thumb, so I went into that group. We discussed the importance of Integrity when it comes to leadership and getting things done. One thing that I noticed As was that my cluster leader was in the same group as me. I could feel my heart smile.

Next was the start to one of the best parts of LeaderShape. Family Cluster Meeting.

One by one, the facilitators, Mike and Lindsay, called out each person's name and his/her designated leader. I couldn't wait to see who was in my family. I felt my leg shaking. I always shake my leg when I feel anxious. Sure enough, the group I was a part of was the last one to be formed.

I noticed that Maggie was in the same group as me, so I stuck with her as I slowly introduced myself to other people in the group. Our family consisted of:

Jason
Maggie
Michael
Taylor
Cotton
Chang
Claudia
Kenneth
Kevin
Khadeejah
Karen
Myself

We left the Learning Center and headed towards our secret meeting spot, which was held in the G dorm of Tercero. Family meeting time consisted of learning activities, and our first one was our "Biographies". We were given a few minutes to draw whatever we wanted to define our own timeline. After that, our whole family shared all kinds of information - personal and casual. It really set the tone for the rest of the week. It really made our family seem like a family. It all happened within an hour and a half.

Now it was time to think of a family name and a family cheer. This reminded me of SPOP. We wanted to do something with Purple because it's an amazing color. Cotton threw out the word, "Iconics". At first I was a little confused because the term just fell from the sky. But, he explained how we were all related to this word, and it made sense to me.

We came up with our cheer and presented it to everyone. No one understood it, but that was our intention.

Day 1 concluded with a lesson on reflection. Lindsay and Mike talked about the power of reflection and how there are different ways to reflect. I love reflecting through written communication (hence my blogging) so I wrote out my thoughts on our worksheet.

What was my "high" today?

Brainstorming ideas for our family cluster cheer; then having a finalized cheer that we were all proud of.

What was my "low" today?

During lunch, I was quiet for a majority of the period.

Looking back, things I could/should/would have done differently today?

I should have tried to talk to more people during lunch break or during our walking excursions.

Right now, what leadership concepts are being reinforced by my past experiences? (In other words, what are you relearning?)

Integrity
The expectations of a community
Diversity - hearing about everyone's life experiences

What did I notice about others today? Myself?

Everyone that I have met so far is very friendly and outgoing. The people in LeaderShape have all experienced all sorts of challenges and accomplishments.

Looking forward, I intend to do the following things at The LeaderShape Institute to build my self-awareness...

Try to talk less. I can be overbearing at times.
Build relationships & not try to meet people on the surface. Quality (deeper conversations) over quantity (number of people I talk to.)

The learning session ended at 10:00 PM. It was time for the festivities to begin.

Earlier in the day, we signed a Learning Agreement. The document stated that we would refrain from consuming alcohol or using drugs. We also agreed to stay within the campus. With that being said, we were limited in our activities, but we all made the most of it. Personally, I love activities that do not involve alcohol because the bonding occurs on a deeper level.

Around this time, I learned that I would not have a roommate for the rest of the week. I was deeply disappointed because I wanted to get close to someone, but I moved on from it.

A bunch of acquaintances and I gathered up in the common room of the H building in Tercero where we played Apples to Apples. As a competitive player, I kept my eyes out for any opponents that would challenge my victory.

I lost to Sam Ortiz. He became the ultimate enemy right then and there. Just kidding. We're good friends now, but he jokingly became my rival for the rest of the evening.

I spent the rest of the evening with one of my family members. It was the start of a beautiful friendship. From the beginning, I had so much respect for him because I learned that his father had recently passed away. Recent as in within the week.

It takes a lot of strength to be away from home when you are mourning.

So much respect. I don't know how he does it.

We talked until I eventually fell asleep at 3:30 AM. I walked my friend out the door and got 3 hours of sleep that night.

The LeaderShape Experience: The Beginning

2011-06-28T01:42:00.000-07:00

Before I continue my story about my own LeaderShape experience, I would like to thank the Delta Sigma Pi Leadership Foundation for selecting me as a scholarship recipient for this learning experience. I would also like to thank Hazel Alvaraz for making this journey possible, as well as Patrick A. Bonfrisco and Connie Choi, the two vital individuals whose letters of recommendation made me look good.

In the seventy-something degree weather, I entered the Tercero Housing Office at the University of California, Davis. As I awkwardly walked in through the glass double-doors, I was received by jovial and anticipating faces.

"Are you here for..."

"Is this for LeaderShape?" I asked.

"Yes!"

Notice my rude interruption.

"AH! Oh my gosh, I'm so excited! I've been waiting for this for a long time!" I felt the excitement building up inside of me. The facilitators looked through their lists to see which group I belonged to.

"She's mine!"

I looked over and shook hands with a very enthusiastic Jason Eagar. He wore a purple shirt that matched well with his skin tone and hair. I was impressed by the smile that he wore on his face. Little did I know that he would become a strong influence in this experience and for the rest of my life.

I waved goodbye to Cleo, my high school friend and UC Davis student who had gone out of his way to help me find the place.

I filled out some papers and personalized my "mailbox" baggie as other students walked in and did the same. After lagging for quite some time, I finished all the necessary paperwork, and rushed to my room to drop of my things.

Suzy, one of the facilitators, helped me with my bags to my room on the third level. There was no elevator, but the struggle wasn't too difficult. As I unlocked the door to my room in H 301, I expected the room to be filled with my soon-to-be-roommate's luggage and personal items.

Instead, my room was empty. Suzy and I placed my bags and I headed down the stairs. Along the way, I ran into two ladies: Nicole and Maggie.

I had been looking forward to meeting Nicole, a member of my co-ed business fraternity. We had known that we would meet each other two months prior to this event. She was what you would call a "Georgia Peach." Yes, she was from Georgia, and yes, she was a lovely woman.

Her roommate, Maggie, was a cheerful spirit that spoke to me as if we had been friends for a long time. My first impression of her personality reminded me of myself.

Nicole, Maggie, and I began our bond as we headed over to the "Learning Center".

This is where my life changed forever.

To be continued in the next post.

Impact

2010-06-25T01:25:00.001-07:00

For as long as I can remember, one of my biggest goals in life has always been to impact people for the better. I love knowing that I've made a positive difference in someone's life, but sometimes I have a hard time realizing that my actions are bigger than what I perceive them to be.

If you don't know, SPOP stands for Student Parent Orientation Program. It doesn't sound very fun. In fact, most incoming freshmen think it's just two days of boring lectures and orientation crap. But, when they arrive they're usually in for a treat, a life changing one.

Life changes also occur within the staffers themselves. After going through this program, I learned a lot about myself and became more comfortable with the person that I am. I also developed a stronger passion and love for the school and the students on this campus. Through this organization, I found a love for getting involved on campus, which is why I always keep myself busy during the school year.

If you're still a student at UCI, don't miss out on the opportunity to apply for SPOP. Applications usually come out during winter quarter. Training occurs during spring quarter on Wednesdays (early evenings). Training sessions are pretty fun and you definitely develop yourself as an individual and as a leader. Summer quarter is where the magic takes place. The magic I'm talking about is the SPOP magic where you feel this burst of energy and passion that happens when you're with other SPOP staffers and with your staffers.

It's one of those things that I simply cannot put into words. No words could do the organization any justice. All I have to say is that it really changed my life. SPOP has made an impact on me, and I urge you to apply and interview because I want everyone to get as much out of it as I've been able to.

This was a conversation that I had with Moises, one of my spoppers when I staffed Gold Year SPOP (2008).

Moises

lol

dont worry

i think thats da last thing u have to worry about

either way ur a beautiful person.both in character and in physique

so why trouble urself with the idea

1:15amMe

lol

i duno

so many beautiful ppl out there

1:15amMoises

lol doesnt mean ur not beautiful haha

include urself in the category

but wat makes u awesome is dat ur butiful inside too

a really great person

1:16amMe

thanks, dear

haha

you're to nice.

too*

1:16amMoises

lol im not

occasionally ill look at my friends

n realize alot of dem arent really my friends

theyre just ppl dat talk to me for one reason or another

n so i remove dem from my life

but ppl like u r one in a million,n even tho i know ur busy,i respect the fact that u have time for ppl

n id say ur pretty true to urself

1:18amMe

thanks love

that means a lot to me

1:18amMoises

well u mean alot to me,n im just glad i ahve u in my life

ur da kind of ppl dat truly make life a joy

id be really sad if for some reason we never spoke again or something

cuz u have truly made an impact in my life

from da start of college,n i really mean dat

1:19amMe

that makes me so happy i'm about to cry

lol

1:19amMoises

lol

1:19amMe

seriously, i just did spop to make an impact on people

1:19amMoises

tears of joy haha =]

1:20amMe

and to help them

yeah for sure tears of joy

1:20amMoises

lol well uve been a nice part of my life

in da short amount of time dat ive had with u here in college

n regardless of whether we speak a little here n der

or have a drawn out convo

i try n keep u in my thoughts n say hello

just to let u know dat i care

1:22amMe

well that really means a lot.

1:22amMoises

im glad =]

Thanks, Mo.

xoxo,

BVL

Happy Father's Day ♥

2010-06-20T19:35:00.001-07:00

Happy Father's Day to all you fathers out there. In honor of this lovely holiday, I'm going to share some things that I love about my dad.

The way my dad laughs at his own jokes. Whenever my dad tells a joke, he starts smiling as he's telling it and then when he finishes his joke, he laughs to himself. My sister and I usually end up laughing too. The joke is usually never funny, but watching my dad laugh to himself makes me smile.

The way my dad talks. My dad speaks with broken English, so sometimes the things that come out of his mouth just don't make any sense. I still remember a long time ago when someone in the family was talking about different races and ethnicities, and my dad blurts out, "That's so racial!" My sister and I looked at each other and I responded, "You mean, racist?" My dad lowered his voice and said, "Oh, dui ya! Shi racist!" It's funny how my sister, brother, and I speak in Chinglish (interchangeably utilizing Chinese and English in the same sentence) and that over the years, my parents have been able to adopt this language.

The way my dad schools players on the court. In case you didn't know, my dad balls it up at the gym, and he schools all the kids (by kids, I mean high school and college students) on the court. He's pretty fit for a 49-year-old. He could destroy anyone. It's pretty amazing watching him block a shot from a 6'2" guy, especially because my father's only 5'8".

The way my dad smiles when he gets ice cream at Cham Sut Gol. Cham Sut Gol is this all-you-can-eat Korean BBQ place in Garden Grove where they also offer endless ice cream at the end. For some reason endless meat + endless ice cream = happy dad. Click here for reviews if you're interested in eating at that place.

Feel free to comment and post some interesting stories about your dad or any father-like figure.

xoxo,

BVL

Comfort Zones and Blindness

2010-06-15T00:21:00.001-07:00

More often than not, people have a tendency to stay within their comfort zones. Perhaps it's because people feel safer when they just stick to what they know. As an adventurer, I've learned to appreciate going out of my comfort zone by trying new foods and initiating conversation with strangers. I still have so much to learn about other cultures and other people, and even though I am pretty open-minded, I am still ignorant because I know nothing about some people and certain cultures.

Because of this, I've attempted to utilize the opportunities in college to try and get myself out there. I've tried to learn more about diversity and social injustice issues by being a part of REACH, while working in various organizations such as Delta Sigma Pi, SPOP, MCC, ABS, and Mesa Court.

Looking back, I feel that I've definitely come a long way. Yesterday, I tried going out of my comfort zone on a Southwest plane flying from Orange County to Silicon Valley. I sat in the very front row (for the sake of leg space). The man to my right had two white canes. He was also wearing shorts, which allowed me to notice that there was something strange about his leg. I ignored this and sat in my seat while eating a filet-o-fish from McDonalds. As the plane took off, I looked all around to see if there was anyone I could initiate conversation with. The man on my left was busy reading, so I didn't have any choice but to speak with the man on my right. I noticed he was bald and had very light blue eyes.

"So what are you going to San Jose for?" I asked.

"I'm going to a rehabilitation center for the blind."

"Oh, I see."

"I've been here for a few months now."

"What were you doing in Orange County?"

"I was visiting my daughter and my grandchildren."

"Cool," I responded, "what's her name?"

At this time, I learned that the old man had given her daughter a Korean name because his wife was Korean.

"My wife passed away a few years ago. It was 2 years after I went blind."

"I'm sorry to hear that." I was at a loss for words. What are people supposed to say in these situations?

"It's alright," he said, "it's all a part of life."

"Yeah, but you must've gone through a lot. If you don't mind me asking, what level or stage of blindness are you at?"

"I can only see light. I can't see you, but I can see that light that the person's using."

"So is it true that when you're blind all your other senses become sharper?"

"Well, yeah, to a certain extent. When you lose your vision, you just learn to be more attentive to the other senses. Like I can feel the air pressure from you sitting there, and people who can see can feel it too. We just rely so much on vision, that we don't really acknowledge all those other senses and feelings."

"Wow, you're pretty interesting," I said.

"Haha, no. Why don't you tell me a little bit about yourself? Where do you go to school?"

At this point in the conversation, I gave him all the little details about me - my year, my major, my experience as a resident advisor, etc.

"So what do you wanna do with everything that you're studying and doing right now?" he asked.

"Actually, I don't really wanna do anything with econ or public health. I really want to go into public relations. What about you? What do you do now?"

"Well, I was a CPA for so many years. Then I had an injury with my leg."

"Oh, what happened?"

"It happened when I was with my wife. I stepped on a piece of metal and then I got gangrene in my legs a few days after. It's prosthetic now."

"What's it made out of?"

"The socket's made of carbon fiber. They used some weird material to make the skin. I just wanted it to look as natural as possible."

"Wow, you've had a lot of interesting life experiences. I'm really glad I talked to you! I always love meeting new people because I feel like I can always learn about people through their challenges and struggles... So now that you're not doing anything, do you wanna work again?"

"Yeah, well I wanna get my education first and then I want to help people, especially veterans. At the rehabilitation center, we always get people coming from the war. It's a lot harder for them because they have their eyesight one minute and in the next minute it's gone."

"If you don't mind me asking, how did you lose your vision?"

"Oh, I just gradually lost it through surgeries. I've had about seven surgeries done on my eyes now. I need to get a cornea transplant."

I paused for a long time. It was hard to keep that kind of conversation going because I really didn't know what to talk about.

"So back when you were my age, what kind of stuff did you do - actually, how did you and your wife meet?"

"Oh boy, well we went to El Camino College in Gardena and I was an English tutor for her. I tutored her for a few weeks then we started dating. There was no more tutoring after that. Haha."

"Aw, that's really cute."

"But yeah, when I was your age, I didn't really know what I wanted to do. In high school, I just did football, wrestling, and golf. I love golf. I went golfing the other day."

"Oh, yeah? How did that go?"

"Hah, it's pretty hard when you're blind like me. We were trying to teach everyone how to golf, it wasn't so difficult for me though."

We ended up talking more about his experiences and things with his family. I was really surprised to have such a positive conversation with someone who had gone through various trials and tribulations. Our conversations were occasionally interrupted by his watch, which was vocal about the time. These reminders really raised awareness about time and appreciation for all the great things I have. People like him really impress and amaze me. It seems that the less a person has, the more appreciative he/she is. The opposite holds true as well.

"Oh, my name is Rick by the way," he said as he stuck out his hand.

"It was such a pleasure talking to you. I'm Belyn." I stuck out my hand to greet his.

It's moments and conversations like these that really make me appreciate what I have and the opportunities where I get to be out of my comfort zone. Thus, I challenge you to go out of your comfort zone and talk to someone who you normally wouldn't speak to. I'm sure you'll be blown away.

"You know, the other day a friend asked me if I'd rather be blind or deaf."

"So what did you say?" I asked.

"Well, it took me a few days to think of the answer. I decided I'd rather be blind."

"Really? Why?"

"Because, look at what's going on here. We are communicating, and that's something that you can't do with vision. I would much rather be able to communicate with someone. It's more meaningful and powerful."

"Wow. You're right. I never thought about it that way."

He was right. That was probably the most meaningful and powerful conversations I've ever had on a flight.

xoxo,

BVL

Happy Mom's Day ♥

2010-05-09T01:10:00.001-07:00

Strengths vs. Weaknesses

2010-05-04T14:30:00.000-07:00

Comments are now up and working.

With fraternity elections coming up, I've been thinking a lot about my strengths and weaknesses. It's given me a lot of anxiety, because I've come up with a list full of strengths and a list full of weaknesses. But now, I'm getting to the point where I've decided that these lists are just a bunch of BS.

I always hear my close friends tell me that people say I'm this way or that way, and it's frustrating when they can't say it to my face. I don't know if people are scared that they might "hurt my feelings" or [insert some excuse here], but there's really nothing to worry about because my skin is actually pretty thick. Honestly, I wish people would tell me what it is about me that concerns them so I could explain myself. There are very few people who know who I really am or what I'm capable of.

Caring/Passionate vs. Emotional/Overly-dramatic
They are not the same thing, but they do stem from the same roots. A person who cares or is passionate will always show emotions for things/people that they care about, which can be interpreted as emotional or overly-dramatic - a negative version of "caring too much". At the end of the day, I'm really proud for being a passionate person. I feel sorry, truly sorry for people who can't be passionate about things the way I am. It just shows that they haven't found something that they love, and that really makes me sad for them.

Experienced/knowledgeable vs. Know-it-all
In a perfect world, the person with the most knowledge and most experience is the one that should take over, but many people are usually intimidated by those who have the most experience because they can be seen as know-it-alls. I personally think it's best to be the experienced one, even if I do come off as a know-it-all. The more wisdom I have, the better.

Moralistic vs. Rule-follower
Most people like individuals who have strong morals. However, there are those who misinterpret moralistic people as those a strict rule-follower. Rule-followers are usually not appreciated because it makes them seem close-minded to ideas. I personally think that it's best to be moralistic because people who lack morals (people who always take the easy way out) will not get very far in life. Plus, who says that moralistic people aren't open-minded? See the next paragraph.

Open-minded vs. Weak-minded
People who are open to ideas can usually be criticized as people who can't make up their own minds. It makes them come off as weak-minded if they listen to other people and are willing to use their own ideas instead of their own. At the end of the day, it's the open-minded people who make better leaders because they're able to see the bigger picture and can enforce diverse and creative ideas to get tasks accomplished.

I've created this entry to show that anything is relative, and anything can be taken as a good thing or a bad thing; a strength of weakness. It really depends on the person's life experiences. Our experiences and knowledge allow us to interpret things differently, which allow us to make unique decisions and thought processes about people, ideas, and other things in life.

Even though it's frustrating that I live in a society where I can't be accepted for who I am, I understand that it all has to do with diversity. I really do appreciate the diversity, because I like being able to understand how other people see things. It's really eye-opening and inspiring. I don't expect anyone to think the way I do, or to appreciate people's differences the way I appreciate them, but it's okay.

I'm still going to conquer the world.

xoxo,

BVL

My Integrity Sounds Like..

2010-04-22T23:27:00.000-07:00

Sterling
Are you playing assassins ra?
10:03pmSterling
ra assassins?
11:25pmMe
i died today
lol
11:25pmSterling
Who was your target and who killed you?
11:25pmMe
don't worry about it
11:25pmSterling
Always ethical
If we were married and we were playing workplace assassins would you still not tell me?
11:26pmMe
i wouldn't.
integrity > love.
hahha
cause if we were married, you'd know ppl at work.
11:27pmSterling
I like that about you
Your ethics.

21

2010-03-18T03:10:00.000-07:00

This isn't going to be an interesting entry. Sorry, people.

I don't know how to feel about my birthday. It's coming up in a few days. Sometimes, I'm excited. When I'm around my residents, they get excited for me, and it makes me pretty happy.

But damn, I really feel like I'm getting old. I know I could be offending people who are in their 30s or 40s. But don't let my feelings affect how you feel.

21 is supposed to be the age that everyone looks forward to because they can party their asses off. Most people who know me pretty well know that I don't really do the whole party thing. Maybe that will change when I'm of drinking age.

I haven't planned anything. I wanted to throw a yacht party, but I'm saving that for down the line. Then I thought about a wine tasting, and then I brought it up with some of my friends.

"That's for old people, Belyn," they would respond.

I personally think that eating cheese and trying different wines would be fun. Classy events are fun, no? And plus, wine > cheap, hard liquor.

Society seems to have a fetish with youth, and I guess I feel like I'm growing out of it, or I've been out of it.

I'm also gaining some serious mass. This has got to stop.

xoxo,

BVL

Let Yourself Feel

2010-03-08T00:09:00.000-08:00

If you're into New Age music, this is such a wonderful song. If you like looking at pretty things, this is a wonderful video. It's very relaxing. Good for studying, falling asleep, daydreaming, or falling in love.

The song is called Ljósið by Ólafur Arnalds. He's an upcoming composer, and his music is pretty amazing.

As for the visuals, the video (Let Yourself Feel) was created by Esteban Diácono. You can find out more information about him on his LinkedIn or his website. Enjoy.

I also wanted to congratulate the Zeta Class of the Pi Sigma chapter of the International Fraternity of Delta Sigma Pi. They are truly a group of outstanding individuals.

I want to wish each and every one of you the best of luck with your fraternal, scholastic, and occupational endeavors. Strive earnestly to work diligently and with passion. Success will never be too far away because you are all so amazing. Don't lose your drive, motivation, and passion!

Photo credits to Alice Hung.

xoxo,

BVL

Neon Green CapSoul

2010-02-19T05:21:00.000-08:00

I was in Econ class when I turned to one of my brothers and saw him looking at this magnificent object on a blog.

Neon Green (goneongreen.com) has launched a revolutionary, state-of-the-art backpack that comes with thin, detachable solar panels. The picture shown above is Neon Green's CapSoul backpack. It also contains a "piggy power bank", allowing your gizmos and gadgets (iPods, laptops, and such) to charge up as you stroll your way through campus.

Here are some of the specs:

RECHARGEABLE CELL:

Cell Type: Lithium ion battery
Capacity: 800mAh/3.7V

OUTPUT:

Output Ports: USB FEMAL
Output Volt/current: 1000mA(Max)
Output Voltage: 5.6V
work Temperature: -10°~40°

PROTECTION:

Reverse current protection circuit
Charge over-voltage protection
Under voltage protection discharge care

SOLAR PANEL OUTPUT (Full / Half Sun)

Voltage: 11.1V /10.8V
current: 158mA /78Ma
Power: 1300 mW / 600mW
If interested, you may pre-order the product here: http://www.shopscratchtracks.com/ProductDetails.asp?ProductCode=99203. The CapSoul will be shipped on May 1, 2010.

It also comes in black and camouflage. Ohh lala..

xoxo,

BVL

Dear MYTW,

2010-02-10T04:23:00.000-08:00

Dear BLB (Big little bro),

I am writing to you in regards to your entry about participation. Apathy is a huge problem that is engulfing a majority of our society. The reason why it was easy to get people to participate in SPOP and ASB is because of the atmosphere that is created by those who take part in those activities. SPOP is filled with people who are ready to change people's lives - SPOP staffers are people who really want to go above and beyond to make the incoming freshmen excited about UCI. ASB is filled with people who want to get students excited about their respective school and its events. In some other organizations, it's hard to find people with that kind of energy. It can be very discouraging. Believe me. But the important thing to remember is to focus on the positives. There will be some people that can be easily motivated, and some people who are on the fence. Those are the people that deserve our time the most. The other people will need more time to get on board, but they don't deserve all of our time. In fact, the majority of people who don't like to participate have already made up their minds about a certain activity or an event even before they've really checked it out. It's their loss, and it's not fair to the people who are really participating if you focus your energy on trying to get people to participate when they clearly do not want to do so.

I hope you can understand. This is something that I learned as a resident advisor, and it's easier to deal with now. Don't focus too much on trying to get almost everyone to participate. You will always be disappointed. Focus your attention on those who participate and get their input because those people are the ones that matter.

xoxo,

BVL (Your LBB)

Hopeless Romantics vs. Hopeless Flirts

2010-02-10T04:00:00.000-08:00

According to UrbanDictionary.com, there is such thing as a hopeless flirter. This is not to be mistaken with a hopeless romantic. Read the definitions and find out which one you are!

Hopeless Romantics

These people are in love with love.They believe in fairy tales and love. They're not to be confused as stalkers or creeps because that's not what hopeless romantic are. All hopeless romantics are idealists - the sentimental dreamers, the imaginative, and the fanciful - when you get to know them. They often live with rose colored glasses on. They make love look like an art form with all the romantic things they do for their special someone.

Hopeless Flirts

These people say they want to be romanced, but they flirt with everybody. Once they find someone that just wants to love them they get bored after two weeks. When the interested person finds someone else, the hopeless flirts will like them again.

Which one are you?

I personally feel that I am a little bit of both. I can be a hopeless flirt until I find the right person. Once I find the right person, BAMF son! I make it a love story.. Yes!

xoxo,

BVL

The Strengthsfinder 2.0

2010-01-30T04:03:00.000-08:00

The Strengths Finder 2.0 is a book that I highly recommend. You can really learn a lot about yourself through this book, which makes it very exciting and easy to read.

Everyone has a lot of the same characteristics, it's just that people tend to exhibit more of a certain characteristic than others. This book helps you find the qualities that you project on a more consistent basis. What I love most is how it contains information on how to work with people who have these traits, and how to manage these traits yourself.

When you purchase this book, you're also purchasing an access code where you will be able to take an assessment (177 questions - timed at 20 sec. each). Check it out at: http://www.strengthsfinder.com.

There are 34 different ideas for strengths. The assessment will give you your top 5. My top 5 include:

Futuristic
Competition
Woo
Strategic
Positivity

If you are interested in purchasing this book, you may order it from Amazon. It's roughly 13.00 dollars. What a bargain.

xoxo,

BVL

Happy Thanksgiving, Niebla

2010-01-22T05:32:00.000-08:00

This is a short clip that I made for my Niebloves.
I hope it makes your heart smile. I love all of my residents. :)

xoxo,
BVL

Alpha 9 - Bliss (Club Mix)

2010-01-22T05:25:00.000-08:00

This is a song that my ex recently sent me. If you are a huge trance fan(especially if you enjoy progressive trance) then this is something that you will enjoy. I love this song.

Here is the link to download:

http://www.fileden.com/files/2007/1/15/644349/02%20Bliss%20-%20Club%20Mix.mp3

Enjoy!

Colby O'Donis feat. T-Pain - Natural High

2010-01-22T05:09:00.000-08:00

Thank you for this song, Johnny. I am so addicted to it.

Here is the link to download:

http://www.fileden.com/files/2007/1/15/644349/Colby%20ODonis%20feat.%20T-Pain%20-%20Natural%20High.mp3

Enjoy the song. :)

xoxo,

BVL

Belyn V. Lai - Canon in D

2010-01-22T05:04:00.000-08:00

I created this song in July of 2006. Since then, I have edited it a few times. This is the version from January 5, 2007. This was the product of a project that I was working on during my senior year in high school. The song was created after I conducted extensive research on music therapy. I used the details and facts that I learned in the subject of music therapy to create this piece.

Later on, I performed this song live for a concert that Katherine Kuo, Patrick Ho, Mira Yoon, and I put on. My performance consisted of piano, beat-box, guitar, 2 violins, 5 part harmonies, and a recitation over the composition. I dedicated this performance to the beautiful couple, Anh and Eachan, who were engaged at that time (and now married!).

The background information was unnecessary, but I hope you can see how much this song means to me, and how it has affected my life and those around me.

Enjoy, and please provide me with your feedback and suggestions. Thank you.
If you wish to download the song, you may find the file at this link:

http://www.fileden.com/files/2007/1/15/644349/Belyn-_Canon_in_D_11507.mp3

xoxo,

BVL